Last week, as part of our latest episode of Lucky to Be Here with Marta Spirk (episode here), we shared her question: What is the last hard thing you have done? Well, this week comes my favorite part:
Celebrating.
First of all, it is my birthday week and I love birthdays so yes, I am taking this chance to share my birthday joy here too. It is no coincidence that I am focusing on celebrating as a topic today.
ut here is the thing: in my book at least, no growth or win can go without a celebration. I promise you there is a reason for that. Or a few.
I was raised in a household where achieving was the mandate and if you did well in school, that was what was expected of you and that was it. At best, we would be able to negotiate some additional perk (or at least avoid having to go work with my dad or cousin at their stores over the summer). Cut to twenty years later, and there I am unpacking this conditioning with my therapist and using Mario Bros and gold stars as a metaphor. I got used to setting the goals and reaching them, to the discomfort of growth and the hard work it took when my ambition kept growing. But I did not stop to celebrate them along the way. It felt neverending, and exhausting. You may resonate with this: accumulating wins and accolades and reasons to feel like we can truly trust ourselves, but not pausing to acknowledge it or celebrate it because there is always something else ahead.
I also realized later in life that a lot of the goals I have set for myself take many years to reach, and no matter how determined you are, there is no amount of determination and stamina that can keep your spirit up, especially during the hard times. Finding small joys and celebrations along the way helped me remind myself that I was climbing each mountain and I was on the right track, even if I had not reached the peak yet.
But what does this look like in practice? The members of AGV Lab for Career Explorers know this really well. Each week, when we check in on our Accountability space, I ask the same question (or a variation of it) as part of the goal setting: How will you celebrate your win this week? Over time, we have all shared a long number of options: going on a hike, eating something delicious, spending quality time with friends. Anything that falls into the category that Parks and Rec’s Tom and Donna would think of as:
For this discussion on discomfort and growth, we left last week’s email on the question that Marta asks herself often: What is the last hard thing you did? Today, I add to that:
How did you celebrate it?
If this makes you realize that you have yet to celebrate it, I have good news for you: our reasons to celebrate do not have expiration dates. Go pick your celebration now. If you need an extra reason to nudge you, think of it as your birthday gift to me (and make sure to let me know you did!).
Next time you are facing a hard thing, make sure to pause, notice it, and pick a celebration for it. Because we can do hard things, and we can celebrate ourselves through them.
Before we wrap up, I have one birthday request for you. Want to celebrate (with) me this birthday week? Please connect me with one person in your life that you think should know about my work. You can reply back to this newsletter to connect us for a call, or share with them the link to subscribe here. Your support and referrals make a world of difference and I appreciate you helping me expand our community as part of my birthday celebration.
Did this reflection resonate with you? What came to your mind as you were reading? Reply back to let me know. I look forward to hearing from you,
