Sometimes we want to avoid this truth, but it usually finds its way back to us: discomfort is a necessary part of our growth. If you want to change jobs, you face discomfort associated with uncertainty first, adjustment later. If you want to do something you have never done, you face discomfort being a beginner at it. If you want to get to know yourself, you face discomfort in the silence that lets you hear your own voice.
Discomfort is always a part of it. Sometimes, that discomfort can feel really lonely, too. Or perhaps, that loneliness is part of what makes it so uncomfortable to begin with. In fact, sometimes we avoid taking the next step because of the fear of what it means to us and those around us. Any transition has things that we gain and things that we need to let go of, in some cases including our communities.
But here is the thing: it is not an either/or. We can grow through the discomfort, and we can do it feeling less alone. In many cases, the changes we make serve also as catalysts for changes around those we love most, too. Your courage to pursue that career goal you have had in mind sparks motivation in that friend of yours who was wondering about trying a new class. Your boldness in moving to a different city or even country can inspire your sibling to consider whether they would want to follow your steps. Most of the time, we fear so much what others would say in a negative way that we miss to witness the many ways we impact others in really positive ways. Ruminating on that fear also gets us stuck in our minds and feeling more alone.
One of the main takeaways from my discussion with Elena Hoffer in our latest Lucky to Be Here episode (you can catch up here) is that feeling less alone helped her make bigger moves, like moving to Sweden, buying her home, and even becoming an entrepreneur after graduation. In my reflection, I invited you to consider one move that you know will feel uncomfortable, but it is necessary for you to reach the goal you have in mind for yourself. What was that move? How does it align (or not) with your intention for your communities this year?
Now you have those answers. Let me give you an example to make it more concrete. Last year, my big move was launching my business and becoming a full-time entrepreneur, and it was deeply uncomfortable because I had never built a business and I mainly saw myself as a researcher, not an entrepreneur. Whatever I had to do would be entirely new territory. When it came to communities, my intention was to build a community that could support me in this transformation while I served those communities I felt called to serve. At times, it has felt a very lonely and isolated process. What made me feel less alone? Seeking spaces and people who had gone through it in some way, and growing alongside others who are also embarking on a similar process.
That is my example. Now is your turn: What can make you feel less alone as you go through your own version of discomfort?
If you are in the DC metro area and you are looking for a space to get to know others in person, and in an informal environment that is lightly facilitated, do not forget to sign up for my upcoming Networking Lab @ Creative Colony happy hour on Wednesday, February 25. You can sign up here. Wherever you are, if you are looking for a space that helps you feel more supported and connected through your career exploration and job search, then AGV Lab might be the space for you, and our doors are open for you to join us.
What came to your mind as you were reading this reflection? Send me an email to let me know and let’s keep the conversation going.
See you next week to continue the conversation about growth and discomforts with a new episode of Lucky to Be Here, where we travel to Brazil, and back.
