(Written version)
We have been working through our understanding of our fears, diving deeper into what is underneath the fear and identifying areas that can help us take some power away from it and back to our sense of agency. But there is one thing that sometimes fuels our fears without us even noticing: it is the trade-offs that we have to face.
One community I am a part of and I absolutely love is the Applied Improv Network, where a whole lot of improv nerds across the world, myself included, meet regularly to support one another in becoming better professionals through the embodiment and implementation of improv principles in our life and work. Think less “what makes this scene funny” and more “how can I say yes and to this one challenge in my work.” A concept I love from our regular meetings is that of COMO: Certainty of Missing Out. We cannot be part of all the breakout rooms all at once, so we all know that we have to make choices as part of it.
This concept has stuck with me because it points to the trade-offs we have to make, and while most of the time we might get stuck in the Fear of Missing Out (FOMO), once we accept that we are bound to miss something no matter what, the question becomes less about what you miss and more about what you value.
I’ll show you what I mean through my ongoing example.
I am facing my fear of failure, which in actuality is fear of feeling out of options, and I have confronted that fear further by identifying what decisions and actions I can take to make sure I can navigate the uncertainty and move past my fear without putting myself in a difficult situation as I fear. In practice, that means that I need to accept trade-offs: one more month of investing in my business might mean one more month of strict budgets to make sure I can provide for myself and grow my business; or it might mean investing more on one side of my business today to make sure that the return-of-investment helps sustain the other parts that I love most.
When you sit with your fear and identify the space where you have power to adjust, adapt, and soothe yourself into your next courageous move, what are the trade-offs you are trying to mitigate? You may not have the answer to which one you are willing to accept yet, but knowing what they are helps you gain clarity on what is ahead.
If there is one thing certain, it is that the only certainty is we always have choices to make, even if some are dreadful or maybe none feels right. In fact, even then, there is a gift to tap into. But that is something for our next, and last, newsletter of October… In the meantime, what insights or questions came up for you? I look forward to reading your reply!
